Senior Bumper Stickers

I sure hope none of us needs these stickers, yet!

Tags:Senior,BumperSticker

Current Mood: Amused

Death Of A Fisherman

The fisherman who died a few days ago was Joan Ramon Domingo. I knew nothing of him until I saw a photo on the newspaper, of a huge crowd of people at his funeral, as if he was a famous movie star or some known personality. In a way he was known to many. He was the vice president of the Fisherman's Association in Sitges, Barcelona.

He was only 58. On that fatal day last week he went out fishing alone as he had been doing for the last few months, when his son stopped being his assistant. His arm got caught by the wired cage for the catch and mortally injured him, in the middle of the night and in the middle of the sea.

The fishing industry had been going down fast in recent times, due to fewer young people willing to enter this very hard profession with little reward. With the imported foreign fish representing now 80% of the sale, leaving 20% only for their outlet. On top of that, the steadily increasing price of fuel to power their boats, higher costs of living and of all amenities, he had found it harder each day to keep up, that's why the son didn't come along any more; The meagre income of the catch simply couldn't justify 2 people's full time work. The combination of all that had cost his life.

Roses where I live now was mainly a fishing village in the past until the last 20 years, with the influx of tourists visiting, and many staying put for the nearly year round sun and fine weather. I used to find it very puzzling the fact that, although it's by the sea and the main industry was fishing, fish prices locally were so very high ( still are, more than meat ). It has become a luxury to have fish on the table, exactly the opposite as it was in the old days when meat was for the well off and fish for the poor.

When I was in Madrid for a 2 week vacation, the fish and all seafood there were much cheaper, yet Madrid is way up on the mountains, no sea anywhere near it at all. It was quite beyond my simple mind and total lack of business sense and logic, that a city on the mountain, with fish supplied by other seaside towns, Roses amongst them, could sell the same product at prices lower than that of the sources - the places where they came from! The answers I got with my endless questions asked of all who would listen were, that Roses had exported the major part of the catch to supply Madrid and other neighbour countries, leaving the local supply scarce!

Just as well I am not a businesswoman. My mind is too straight forward and logical for business strategies and commercial intrigues.

Tags:fisherman,businessstrategies

Current Mood: Confused

Amusing American Court Records

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!

ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty.

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you #*%^@ %) me?

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh.... I was getting laid!

Attorney: She had three children, right?
Witness: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Are you #@%*& me? Your Honour, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Now whose death do you suppose terminated it?

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Guess.

ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you like to rephrase that?

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral.

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!

ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh....are you qualified to ask that question?

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Tag:CourtRecords

Current Mood: Amused

The 1st Birdman - Jetman

Several years ago, Yves Rossy, 49 year old Swiss and employed in the Swiss International Airline, had become the first man in history to have crossed the English Channel (35 kilometres) with the help of a propelling motor, entirely fabricated by himself, adhered to his back.

After dropping from a plane from the height of 2.500 meters altitude, in France, he reached Dover, a coastal town of England at the end of 9 minutes 32 seconds. The exploit had completed after having to suspend his 'flight' twice due to unfavourable meteorological conditions. He touched ground in Dover in the morning safe, sound and very content. The total success had exceeded his originally calculated time, shorter by 3 minutes, and enough fuel left in the 4 turbines, also designed by him, to perform acrobatics in the air to celebrate the successful event.

Some call him the 'Jetman' but I prefer 'Birdman'. What about you? Now I just wonder if there had been anyone who had broken that record?

Tags:Birdman,Jetman

Current Mood: Accomplished