Things You Should Know By Now ...

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

2. Don't worry about what people think, they don't do it very often.

3. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

5. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.

6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.

7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.

8. It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.

9. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.

10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.

11. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of cheques.

12. A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good.

13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.

14. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.

15. No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes.

16. A balanced diet is a beer in each hand.

17. Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.

18. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.

19. Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.

20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.

21. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognise a mistake when you make it again.

22. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.

23. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy fridge.

24. Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.

25. It's not the jeans that make your bum look fat.

26. If you had to identify, in 1 word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, & never will achieve, its full potential, that word would

be "meetings".

27. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness".

28. People who want to share their religious views with you never want you to share yours with them.

29. You should not confuse your career with your life.

30. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

31. Never lick a steak knife.

32. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

33. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we put the clocks back.

34. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

35. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

36. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age,gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers and have a sense of humour

37. A person, who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.

38. Your friends love you anyway.

39. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

Would somebody give me N0. 40? I like round numbers.

Tags:ThingsToKnow

Current Mood: Amused

A Wordless Love Story

There's a local family who goes to the same cafe almost as regularly as I do, that is, just about every morning. They are even crazier than I am. With my house less than 5 minutes' walk away from the coffee shop, I choose to have my coffee out there, and this family lives even closer from it, as their house is about half way between mine and the cafe. As if none of us have any coffee at home.

We are on greeting terms, a nod, a smile or mouthing a hello or good morning. The friendliest gesture ever shown was that a couple of times one of them had passed me the newspaper once they had done with it, instead of putting it back on the rack near the entrance. Occasionally our tables are by chance very close, but we have never exchanged even the briefest conversation.

This morning was one of those that our tables were next to each other, so I could hear parts of their conversation. I said parts because they always speak in Catalan, which I can only understand about 50 or 60%, although I can read a lot more than that. Normally this family seems very close, old couple in their late 60's I reckon, son about 35 or so but his wife was rarely there. During weekends and school holidays, a boy of about 9 or 10 would be with them sometimes, 3 generation together. I envy such closeness, the whole family together having breakfast in a local cafe, every morning, reading the papers, or amiably chatting. I often wonder why the son can be there every morning until about 11 a.m. Doesn't he work somewhere?

This morning though, the harmonious atmosphere was absent. The old couple especially, both looked a little distant, bordering on indifferent with each other. No more of those occasional glances at each other with a smile, and no more exchanges of words. I wasn't overly concerned about this at first until I heard the sudden raised voices, first from him, then her. After a couple of minutes I could tell they were in fact quarrelling about something. The son kept his attention completely on the food as if he hadn't notice anything not quite right, or as if his parents weren't even there. Before long the argument got louder and, the old man especially, seemed to be furious with his wife.

I adopted their son's attitude and kept my gaze firmly on my newspaper to avoid embarrassment. When I stole a quick glance later over their direction, I saw the old lady keeping her mouth tightly shut but with a very angry expression. The son finally finished his food, got up, and just walked out of the cafe. I don't think he had said a word, not even good bye.

Soon after the old man paid the bill, got up, stretched out his hand towards his wife, but said nothing. She hesitated just a few seconds before deciding to give him her hand. He took it to help her up. They walked out of the cafe and, from the glassed window, I saw him put his arm around her, and I swear I saw her head tilt a little, to rest briefly on his shoulder. They move towards the direction of their home, with his arm round her & her head still on his shoulder, all the way till they were out of my sight.

I put down my paper and thought: what a beautiful ending. He was the angrier one during the argument, but he was also the one to offer her his hand first. And she graciously accepted without having to say a word. The way they walked off like the devoted couple they must have been all their lives; the mutual unspoken conclusion they gave to the unpleasant episode, leaving it in the cafe instead of taking it home ...

Tags:lovestory

Current Mood: Content

High Tech Generation - Artists & Artisans

There seem to be a lot more artists these days than in the past. Either that or the word artist is not used what the dictionaries define it as any more, but denominate many more types of work or professions. There are now artists in every field, many at first glance don't seem to have a lot to do with art. If one is good at any one thing, he starts thinking that he is an artist. I suppose one can say so if one has profound knowledge of something and, plus the added know-how of able to manipulate, recycle, embellish, combine with other material with it, so that the end product resembles or becomes work of art or better still, living art.

But then there is such a word: artisan, or craftsman. Is there also the word craftswoman? Not sure and I am too lazy to leave my seat to go looking for a dictionary. Anyway, back to what I was saying ...

Are artists also artisans then? Take the youngsters of today for instance. The generation that's born and brought up in this multimedia world, with the fast developing digital technology. Many of them learn to use a computer, expertly, even before they know how to phrase an email with coherent sentences and correct spelling. But they are artists in ways and means to manipulate video games, upload, download, mix and match with more tools than I know existed, to solve problems and create new games and videos, set up dazzling personal sites, create theme groups and recruit like minded Cyber partners, inventors and friends. And artists.

I think they are more aptly termed artisans. A painter would exhibit his paintings in a gallery, these artisans would display them adding interesting or animated background environment, music, animation, visual and audio effects ... making the whole experience a festival to be enjoyed. A few might over exercise their talents, but I am more for real artistic accomplishment expertly achieved and exhibited. What's more, the already amazing exhibit allows further addition or change, from others taking part in the same project, a continuous project inviting further development and progress.

What wouldn't I give for being half as clever as these awesome youngsters! Generally I am happy in my own skin, just that in the technology area I am thick as two planks of wood!

Tag:TechGeneration,Artist,Artisan,LivingArt

Current Mood: Artistic