Men Are Like ...

For all those men who say, "Why buy a cow 
when you can get milk for free?"

Here's an update for you: Nowadays, 80% of women 
are against marriage. Why?

Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig
just to get a little sausage.

Men are like ...

** Men are like ... Laxatives - They irritate the crap out of you.

** Men are like ... Bananas - The older they get, the less firm they are.

** Men are like ... Weather - Nothing can be done to change them.

** Men are like ... Blenders - You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

** Men are like ... Chocolate Bars - Sweet, smooth, 
& they usually head right for your hips.

** Men are like ... Commercials - You can't believe a word they say.

** Men are like ... Department Stores - Their clothes are always 1/2 off!

** Men are like ... Government Bonds - They take soooooooo long 
to mature.

** Men are like ... Mascara - They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

** Men are like ... Popcorn - They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

** Men are like ... Lava Lamps - Fun to look at, but not very bright.

** Men are like ... Parking Lots - All the good ones are taken, 
the rest are handicapped.

** Men are like ... Snowstorms - You never know when they're coming,

how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.

I'm not responsible for these sayings!!

Tag:Men

Current Mood: Amused

If You Can ...

If you can start the day without caffeine, If you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains, If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles, If you can eat the same food every day and be grateful for it, If you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any time, If you can take criticism and blame without resentment If you can ignore a friend's limited education and never correct her/him, If you can resist treating a rich friend better than a poor friend, If you can conquer tension without medical help, If you can relax without liquor, If you can sleep without the aid of drugs, ...Then You Are Probably The Family Dog! WOOF! Tag:FamilyDog

Current Mood: Amused