Saturday, 27 August 2011

27th Aug 2011 When God Created The Cat ...

Aug 27B Cat1
When GOD created the World, He chose to put animals in it, and decided to give each whatever it wanted. All the animals formed a long line before His throne, and the Cat quietly went to the end of the line.
To the elephant and the bear He gave strength; to the rabbit and the deer, swiftness; to the owl, the ability to see at night; to the birds and the butterflies, great beauty; to the fox, cunning; to the monkey, intelligence; to the dog, loyalty; to the lion, courage; to the otter, playfulness. And all these were things the animals begged of GOD. At last he came to the end of the line, and there sat the little cat, waiting patiently.
"What will YOU have?" GOD asked the Cat.
Cat 2

The Cat shrugged modestly. "Oh, whatever scraps you have left over. I don't mind."
"But I'm GOD. I have everything left over. You can ask for anything!"
Then I'll have a little of everything, please" said the Cat.

Cat 3Cat4Cat 5Cat 6Cat 7Cat 8Cat 9Cat 10
And GOD gave a great shout of laughter at the cleverness of this small animal, and gave the Cat everything she asked for, adding grace and elegance and . . . only for her, a gentle purr that would always attract humans and assure her a warm and comfortable home.

I purr too when I am happy, contented
and cuddled!!

Prev: 27th Aug 2011 Sarcastic Or Humourous Oneliners

27th Aug 2011 Sarcastic Or Humourous Oneliners

Aug 27aa
  1. Police Station toilet stolen....Cops have nothing to go on.
  2. Schizophrenia beats being alone.
  3. If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
  4. You have the capacity to learn from your mistakes. You will learn a lot today.
  5. A thing not worth doing isn't worth doing well.
  6. If a thing is worth doing, it would have been done already.
  7. Ham and Eggs: A day's work for a chicken; A lifetime commitment for a pig.
  8. Hard work never killed anyone, but why chance it?
  9. All true wisdom is found on T-shirts.
  10. I think sex is better than logic, but I can't prove it.
  11. Lord, if I can't be skinny, please let all my friends be fat.
  12. Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
  13. Confession is good for the soul, but bad for your career.
  14. Sometimes too much to drink isn't enough.
  15. Jesus loves you! It's everybody else that thinks you're an ass.
  16. When blondes have more fun do they know it?
  17. Money isn't everything, but it sure keeps the kids in touch.
  18. Losing a husband can be hard. In my case it was almost impossible.
  19. My wild oats have turned to Shredded Wheat!
  20. Is reading in the bathroom considered multi-tasking?

Prev: 27th Aug 2011 Giggles - All Women's Troubles Start With Men ...

27th Aug 2011 Giggles - All Women's Troubles Start With Men ...

Aug 27
Ever notice how all of women's problems start with MEN?
Woman has Man in it;
Mrs. has
Mr. in it;
Female has
Male in it;
She has
He in it;
Madam has
Adam in it;

Doesn't it all make sense now? If you are not convinced, look again:

MEN
tal illness
MEN
strual cramps
MEN
tal breakdown
MENopause
GY
naecologist
AND: When we have REAL trouble, it's a ... HISterectomy.
Okay, it's just a wicked joke. But, remember:
You don't stop laughing because you grow old;
You grow old because you stop laughing.
Prev: 26th Aug 2011 God & St. Francis Discussing Lawns