The Dentist, The Old Lady, & The Rubber Gloves

Next time you use a pair of rubber gloves, you're going to smile when you think of this:

A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves, to calm her nurves.

'Do you know how they make these gloves?' he asked.

'No, I don't,' she replied.

'Well,' he spoofed, 'there's a building in Canada with a big tank of latex and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let them dry, then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right size.'

She didn't crack a smile. 'Oh, well. I tried,' he thought.

But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she burst out laughing.

'What's so funny?' he asked

'I was just envisioning how condoms are made!'

Gotta watch those little old ladies! Their minds are always Working!

Tag:rubbergloves

For All Who Were Born Between The 30's & The 70's

TO ALL WHO WERE BORN IN THE 1930's 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's !!

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they carried us.
They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes.

Then after that trauma, our baby cribs were covered with bright coloured lead-based paints.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.

As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.

Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat.

We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.

We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank soda pop with sugar in it, but we weren't overweight because...
WE WERE ALWAYS OUTDOOR PLAYING!!

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.

No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, no video tape movies, no surround sound, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms. WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.

We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.

We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.

We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them!

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't have to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!

This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!

The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.

We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned
HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!

And YOU are one of them!

CONGRATULATIONS! Tags: Foodforthought

Is Virginity A Matter Of The State Now?

Apparently yes, according to the court decision yesterday, in Lille, northern France. It had also been deemed as "an essential quality" of a woman. The Court accepted the petition of the husband who, on the wedding night, found his new wife not a virgin and he sent her home to her parents that very same night, and immediately started legal petition to have the marriage annulled. This happened in April and yesterday the Tribunal Court granted his petition. The marriage is now legally non existent.

However, the matter evoked huge outcry in all sectors, inciting social debates and furious political storm, obligating the Minister of Justice, originally reluctant, to command the public prosecutor the presentation of an appeal and a reversion. The Prime Minister condemned it as "going back to the middle ages" and added that "if necessary, would take the matter to the High Court of Repeal and jurisprudence."

The groom's reasons: The rejection of the bride was not entirely because she was not a virgin, but her lie leading him to believe she was.

The lawyer representing the husband: His client felt he could not build a solid union with a liar right from the start of their life together, and in whom he felt he could never trust.

The rejected wife: "I am relieved that the marriage is over. Can't stay with a man who thinks virginity is more important than the woman herself."

The court in Lille: "The marriage was contracted under the influence of an objective error, which had been the determining factor of the agreement of marriage. And, the woman had admitted that she lied."

The public: Outrageous to consider virginity as an essential quality of a woman, violation of liberty and human rights, incrimination against women when no one ever questions a man's virginity ...

Me: I am somewhat confused. Like watching a film scene of a court of justice, featuring a prolonged proceeding and listening to the prosecutor and defence lawyer, both brilliant, each giving very convincing arguments. Confused and complicated further by witnesses' sometimes contradicting accounts, I often find that I agree with EVERYBODY! Or, put in another way, I disagree with ALL of them.

My views: Well, the husband was right in that he felt he couldn't construct a permanent union with a woman who lied. But I doubt also whether her not being a virgin was not the primary motive. Although he lives in modern times with French nationality and an engineer, he is a Muslim.

The woman should never have lied but ... If she couldn't tell the absolute truth about herself with someone she was to spend the rest of her life with, how often she would need to lie in a whole life time? But then, if virginity was in their religion, or personal and deep-rooted conviction as the foremost virtue, she was likely so frightened that her loved one wouldn't accept her. Which had now been proven true.

As to the public, in the personal matter between husband and wife, it's nobody else's business why they got together or why they part. The Law? Definitely needs mending, but not because this particular couple should be united together again as a married couple, but virginity or lack of it should never be legal ground for an annulment.

Tags:virginity,marriage,law

• Current Mood: blah

life's Ironies

• Life is sexually transmitted.
• Good health is merely the slowest rate at which one can die
• Men have two emotions: Horny and Hungry. If he'S not chasing you, make him a sandwich.
• Give a person a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and he won't bother you for weeks.
• Some people are like a slinky - not really good for much, but you can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
• Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital dying of nothing.
• All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
• Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars, and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
• In the 60s, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
• They know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America, but they haven't a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located.
  
  Tag:irony

• Current Mood: amused