9th Sept 2011 Blog For Sale

I am copying here, word for word, an open letter for all, published yesterday in the local Spanish newspaper. (Naturally I have translated it to English). It intrigues me as I can't understand how an unemployed biologist could expect someone to buy his online Blog for 3,000 €. Even more intriguing, what gave him that particular idea that out of the million upon million Blogs online, which anybody could just copy, and keep if they wish, would give him the 3,000 € for it?

 

"I am 43, licensed biologist but unemployed since 2007. During these years, I have received no economic help at all from any source. I own nothing: no apartment, no car, no endorsement nor guarantees, not even a mother-in-law.

 

My dream will be that the surname of my next president does not begin with 'R', but, dreaming gets me nowhere. My reality is that I need 3,000 € to form my first autonomous business and absolutely no one would lend me the money. So, I am selling my Blog on Internet, the only thing I have, for 3,000 €.", following by:-

http://xyerectus.blogspot.com

My Tel: 636 635 942

 

Is this for real? Are there actually people who buy Blogs? What for? Why?

 

Tags: blogforsale

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9th Sept 2011 Blog For Sale

9th Sept 2011 Nearly Paraprosdokianism - Mixture Of Wit & Acid Humour

Nearly Paraprosdokianism ~

• A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
• You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
• The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!
• Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back!
• A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
• Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at home, even if you wish they were.
• Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
• Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
• There's a fine line between cuddling, and holding someone down so they can't get away.
• I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
• I always take life with a grain of salt, plus a slice of lemon, and a shot of tequila.
• When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.
• You're never too old to learn something stupid.
• To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
• Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
• Some people hear voices. Some see invisible people. Others have no imagination whatsoever.
• A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.
• If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?
• Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. Have a great day or pretend to!

Not Paraprosdokian Examples - Just Quirky English Logic ~

• Have you noticed that there is neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
• And there are no hogs in Hogmanay.
• And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
• Quicksand only works slowly.
• If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth?
• If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

Tags: paraprosdokianism

Prev: 9th Sept 2011 Paraprosdokian - Mixture Of Wit & Unexpected Humour

9th Sept 2011 Paraprosdokian - Mixture Of Wit & Unexpected Humour

Paraprosdokian is a figure of speech, well understood and often used by comedians. The key point is that the final words are surprising and unexpected, making the reader or listener see the first part of the sentence in a new light. Here are some examples:

Sarcastic and funny ~

• If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
• We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
• Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
• The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
• I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way; so I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
• Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
• The last thing I want to do is hurt you; but it's still on the list.
• Light travels faster than sound; this is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
• If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?
• War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

 

Descriptive or philosophical ~

• To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
• A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.
• How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
• I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted pay checks.
• A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it.
• I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
• Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but they have to check when you say the paint is wet?
• Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America ?
• Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
• Evening News is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed by telling you why it isn't.

 

Tags: paraprosdokian

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