Tuesday, 30 August 2011

30th Aug 2011 Old Folks' Wisdom On Walking & Exercise

Aug 30B
  • Walking can add minutes to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $4,000 per month.
  • I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
  • The only reason I would take up walking is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
  • I have to walk early in the morning, before my brain figures out what I'm doing ...
  • I joined a health club last year, spent about 250 bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to go there everyday!
  • Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise', I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
  • The advantage of exercising every day is so when you die, they'll say: 'Well, he looks good doesn't he?'
  • If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.
  • I know I got a lot of exercise the last few years ... just getting over the hill.
  • Every time I start thinking too much about how I look, I just find a pub with a Happy Hour, and by the time I leave, I look just fine!
  • We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
  • A perfect summer day is when the sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, the birds are singing and the lawn mower is broken.
Prev: 30th Aug 2011 Lost In Thought ... Ducks & Chickens

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