Have
you amongst your friends or acquaintances a Mr. or Mrs Chatter Box?
You know, the person who is always happy or at least seemingly so, very
friendly, almost overly so? On top of those very affable qualities,
he/she can always talk for at least 5 minutes or longer, without having
to stop to take a breath? Always has a lot to tell you, inform you,
advice you, relate or explain to you & ask you a whole string of
questions all in one long breath?
I do, have such a friend I mean. More of an acquaintance, in my book anyway. It's a HE so I'll call him Mr. Chatty here.
No
sooner had I walked into my daily haunt this morning, & before I
had found a table to sit down, Mr. Chatty spotted me, sprung up from
his chair & rushed over planting a sloppy kiss on both my cheeks. I
was just about to say Hello but ...
"
Hey, fancy seeing you here ( He has always known I am in this same
cafe each morning )! How are you? Oh, no need to tell me (okay, I
won't), you look just gorgeous (his standard phrase to every woman)!
So you had been away to UK, huh? How was it? In Croydon again were you?
Was it Croydon? Were you caught there by the non-stop rain? Wasn't
that awful? How long were you there? Bet you were mighty glad getting
back here in the sun, he? But of course you were! Would you like to
..."
I
had stopped listening somewhere round the bit about Croydon, & all
along I was never given the chance to say a word or answer any of the
questions, except " Ah, Yes, Really? Umm ... " every now & then. Of
course answers were not necessary nor were they even expected for sure.
In any case, he had confirmed certain facts all by himself & had
already answered the rest!
For
courtesy sake, I waited until he involuntarily needed to stop to take
his first breath & said : " Hey, new shirt. Lovely", with the hope
that he might stop asking me more questions. The tactic worked but then
he immediately launched into a long story of the complex procedures of
choosing it, buying it, when, how, why, what for ...
I
was saved by the arrival of his friend who was apparently 15 minutes
late (I hated him for tha ) coming to join him. I couldn't wait to
make my escape fast enough, & moved myself as far away from their
table as I could. He called after me:
" Give my regards to your brother! "
My brother?? I don't have a brother!!!
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