I
am almost sure I had posted this one before, but I am too lazy to
check amongst the 4060 Blogs (to date) and this one is staring me in my
face saying 'Take me, take me ...' Anyway, it's good for a laugh.
1) English Words with Quirky Logic ~
* Have you noticed that there is neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
* English muffins weren't invented in England
* French fries do not originate in France.
* A guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
* And there are no hogs in Hogmanay.
* And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
*
You cannot buy boots in Boots nor virgins in Virgin. You cannot buy
threshers in Threshers and the Superdrug chain is a big disappointment.
* Quicksand only works slowly
* If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth?
* If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
* If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
* A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.
2) Strange Words ~
* There is no parlour in in parlous. (Parlous - dangerous, hazardous)
* Sweetmeats are sweets while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
* When you are incommunicado: you are without the means to communicate.
3) The Problem with Speaking English ~
* Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
* Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
* Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
* Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
* Germans drink beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
* CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.
Tags: quirkylogic
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