It
has happened to me countless times before, this inexplicable lethargy,
like an invisible net that wraps me up tight and secure like a parcel,
rendering me helpless and feel as though I don't even have enough
energy to struggle. I feel totally powerless, listless and irritable.
Each time it happens, I try to analyse what triggers such unpleasant
state of mind and body but, there never seems to be any specific
factor. As always I surrender to let it run it's course, a few hours, a day, even two ...
I
know it is not depression although it is depressing to feel that way,
when I really don't like to be in such a state at all. It's not even
logical to be listless yet at the same time restless. The mind is often
active, could even be more than normal, making great effort to trace
the cause, to do something, to change something, get something, buy
something, throw out something; but the body is inert, refusing to carry
out even simple and reasonable actions like get up and go make myself
some coffee or tea, go window shopping, visit the hairdresser, find
somebody to gossip with. Those trivial diversions, or frivolous spending to get myself a useless gift, used to work but now no more.
It's
not my nature either to be sad and feel miserable. Even though not
exactly extrovert, I am usually at peace with the world and prone to be
easily pleased with very simple pleasures. Watching a cute baby would
always make me smile, or animals at play, the blue sky on a fine day,
the sunset. I will talk to dogs I meet in the street and I laugh
easily. Mind you I cry easily too. Occasionally for no reason!
Is
there anything wrong with me then? I guess plenty, but not to do with
health or mind. I know this unpleasant feeling will past, it always
does after a little while ...
Tags:Lethargy,Laugh,Cry
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