Health Advice & Longivity

** Keep taking the pills ~

Arnie went to see his doctor and told him that he hadn't been feeling at all well. The doctor examined Arnie, left the room, and came back with three different bottles of pills.

Looking at Arnie he says, "Take the green pill with a big glass of water when you wake up. Take the blue pill with a big glass of water after you eat lunch. Then just before going to bed, take the red pill with another big glass of water."

Startled to be put on so much medicine, the man stammered, "L ... L ... Lummee, Doc, exactly what is my problem?"

The doctor replied, "Arnie, you're not drinking enough water."

** Secret elixir of longevity?

Gloria, out for a walk, notices this little all wrinkled up old man rocking in a chair on his porch and approaches him.

"I can't help noticing how happy you look," Gloria smiles at him, "What is your secret for a long happy life?"

"I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day," he replied, "I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise."

"That's amazing!" Gloria responds, "How old are you?"

"Twenty-six," he replies.

Tags:health,longivity

• Current Mood: amused