** Sex drive
Morris
is 85 years old and goes for a medical. After the examination, his
doctor says to him, "You're in remarkable shape for a man of your age."
"I know it," said Morris, "but I've got a problem. My sex drive is too high. Have you got anything you can give me for it?"
The doctor's mouth dropped open. "Your what?" he gasped.
"My sex drive," repeated Morris, "is too high and I'd like you to lower it."
"Lower it?" exclaimed the doctor, still unable to believe what his 85 year old patient was saying. "Just what do you consider high?"
"I know it," said Morris, "but I've got a problem. My sex drive is too high. Have you got anything you can give me for it?"
The doctor's mouth dropped open. "Your what?" he gasped.
"My sex drive," repeated Morris, "is too high and I'd like you to lower it."
"Lower it?" exclaimed the doctor, still unable to believe what his 85 year old patient was saying. "Just what do you consider high?"
"These days it seems like it's all in my head, doctor," replies Morris, "and I'd like to have you lower it a couple of feet if you can."
** Blonde Logic
Blondie walked into a print lab to have a photo of her deceased husband David copied and retouched.
She said to the technician, "I have always hated the hat that my husband David is wearing in the photo. Could you please retouch the hat out?"
"Of course," said the technician, "what colour hair did your husband have?"
She said to the technician, "I have always hated the hat that my husband David is wearing in the photo. Could you please retouch the hat out?"
"Of course," said the technician, "what colour hair did your husband have?"
"When you take the hat off, you'll see," she said.
** Let the boss go first
A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss, are on their way to a meeting. On their journey through a park, they come across an oil lamp sticking out of the ground under a bush. They pick it up, rub it, and out pops a genie.
The genie says, "Thank you very much. I normally grant three wishes but as there are three of you, I can only allow one wish each."
Without
waiting for the others, the eager senior manager shouted, "I want the
first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast boat with loads of
money and have no worries for the rest of my life."
POW and he was gone.
POW and he was gone.
The junior manager couldn’t keep quiet and shouted, "I want to be in Florida with beautiful girls all around me, and plenty of good food and champagne."
POW and he was gone too.
The boss then calmly said, "Here’s my wish. I want those two idiots back in my office immediately after lunch."
Current Mood: 
Amused
Amused
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