Mother Knows Best

** Mother knows best

Benny is almost 32 years old. All his friends are now married but Benny just dates and dates. Finally his friend asks him, "What's the matter, Benny? Are you looking for the perfect woman? Are you really that fussy? Surely you can find someone who suits you?"

"No I just can’t," Benny replies. "I meet many nice girls, but as soon as I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn't like them. So I keep on looking!"

"Listen," his friend suggests, "why don't you find a girl who's just like your mother?"

Many weeks go by and again Benny and his friend get together.

"So, have you found the perfect girl yet? One that's just like your mother?"
Benny shrugs his shoulders, "Yes, I found one just like mum. Mum loved her right from the start and they have become good friends."

"So, are you and this girl engaged yet?"
"I'm afraid not. My father can't stand her!"

** That’s the way to do it
 

One day, three men were hiking and unexpectedly came upon a large raging, violent river. They needed to get to the other side, but had no idea of how to do so.

The first man prayed to God, saying, "Please God, give me the strength to cross this river." Poof! God gave him big arms and strong legs, and he was able to swim across the river in about two hours, but only after almost drowning a couple of times.

Seeing this, the second man prayed to God, saying, "Please God, give me the strength ... and the tools to cross this river." Poof! God gave him a rowboat and he was able to row across the river in about an hour, but only after almost capsizing the boat a couple of times.

The third man had seen how this worked out for the other two, so he also prayed to God saying, "Please God, give me the strength and the tools...and the intelligence... to cross this river." And poof! God turned him into a woman. She looked at the map, hiked upstream a couple of hundred yards, then walked across the bridge

Tags:mother, bridge

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