No More Funerals

Last week, for the first time in my life I attended a funeral, of a dear friend of mine. He was tall, dark, handsome, with exceptional intelligence, sharp sense of humour, and an optimistic outlook on life. Victim of cancer, he died of it way ahead of anybody's expiration age at just 36. Not totally unexpected as he had been sick for almost a year, but that didn't make the pain any more bearable for his family and friends. Not for me. For the last few days I had not been able to talk about it, write about it, nor think about it, even to myself. Life is such, so full of surprises and eventualities; some call it destiny and I think I am amongst them. I believe in coincidences, chances, telepathy, premonition and, yes, destiny. Or any eventuality to call it by another name. At times I even look for them, sometimes I find them, contemplate them, share or accept them and, sometimes, I write about them. Not sure though if I believe in the predetermined coincidences or chances, but they do usually give fairly clear indications or directions how things might go or end up. For some unexplainable reason I knew this dear friend, respected and loved, would not be there for me forever. But never have I thought it's death that parted us. Fully aware of my own sensibility and the way I get emotional even seeing a stranger suffer or a stray cat die, I had decided years ago I would not attend any funeral, not anybody's, not even my parents (that was due to unusual and unavoidable circumstances) I had not done so although, there had been a couple of occasions when social etiquette demanded I should. This time, it's the mother of my friend who had specifically requested my presence, and I have high respect for all mothers, especially when this one was in extreme pain losing her only son. That's over now. I feel as though a small part of me had died too. I will never attend any funeral again. Not even my own!!! Tags:destiny,funeral

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