The Scot - Couldn't Spit It Out ~
Jock walks into a bar one day and stammers, 'Does anyone here own that South Doberman Pinschers outside?'
'Yeah, I do,' a tattooed biker says, standing up. 'What about it?'
"Well, I think my little Scotty terrier just killed him.'
'What are you talkin' about?' the biker says, disbelievingly. 'How could your little runt kill my Doberman?'
'What are you talkin' about?' the biker says, disbelievingly. 'How could your little runt kill my Doberman?'
'Well,' mumbled Jock, 'it appears that he got stuck in your dog's throat.'
The Irish - A Barking Dog ~
'O'Toole and his wife are in bed one night and they hear the neighbour's dog is barking its head off in the garden. Somewhat disturbed by the noise, O'Toole explodes, 'Botheration and that!' and storms off downstairs.
He comes back upstairs five minutes later and his wife asks, 'What did you do, O'Toole?'
O'Toole replies with a wide grin, 'I've put the dog in our garden so I did, now let's see how they like it.'
He comes back upstairs five minutes later and his wife asks, 'What did you do, O'Toole?'
O'Toole replies with a wide grin, 'I've put the dog in our garden so I did, now let's see how they like it.'
The English - Jumping The Gun ~
Teacher: 'Paul. Give me a sentence beginning with "I".
Paul: 'I is the… '
Teacher: 'No, Paul . You must say "I am" not "I is."
Paul: 'All right. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
Paul: 'I is the… '
Teacher: 'No, Paul . You must say "I am" not "I is."
Paul: 'All right. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
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