Wednesday, 5 October 2011

5th Oct 2011 Oxymoron, Etc.

Oct 05A
  • I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
  • It's not the minutes spent at the table that put on weight, it's the seconds.
  • For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.
  • If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
  • Terminal Illness - Getting sick at the airport.
  • It cost 7 million dollars to build the Titanic, and 200 million to make a film about it.
  • Funny names for children: Hazel Nutt, Phil Hole, Anna Sasin and Doug Graves.
  • Don't give up. Moses was once a basket case!
  • Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
  • A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
  • The United States has never lost a war in which mules were used.
  • Oxymoron: Look at that giant midget settle on the jumbo shrimp.
    • Customer: 'Do you serve lobsters?'
      Waiter: 'We serve anybody, sir.'
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