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Behind every successful man there is a surprised woman.
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Perfect numbers like perfect men are very rare.
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Men
are simple things. They can survive a whole weekend with only three
things: beer, boxer shorts and batteries for the remote control.
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To attract men, I wear a perfume called ‘New Car Interior’.
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Men are alive for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
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All men are not homeless, but some men are home less than others.
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Men can read maps better than women. Cause only the male mind could conceive of one inch equalling a hundred miles
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If
you never want to see a man again, say, ‘I love you, I want to marry
you. I want to have children with you …’ – they leave skid marks.
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A man in the house is worth two in the street.
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A genius is a man who can re-wrap a new shirt and not have any pins left over.
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Young men think old men are fools; but old men know young men are fools.
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Give a man a free hand and he’ll run it all over you.
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I only like two kinds of men, domestic and foreign.
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Men who don’t understand women fall into two groups: Bachelors and Husbands.
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Man has will, but woman has her way.
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If you want something said, ask a man; if you want something done, ask a woman.
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When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.
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Women don’t make fools of men most of them are the “do-it-yourself” types.
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Men are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time … they’re gone.
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You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.
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A gentleman is simply a patient wolf.
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Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near.
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To a woman the first kiss is just the end of the beginning but to a man it is the beginning of the end.
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To
be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a
little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to
understand her at all.
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Men
marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with
the hope they will change. And they are both disappointed.
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