Sunday, 5 February 2012

5th Feb 2012 Men, Women, Mainly Men ...

Feb 05A
  • Behind every successful man there is a surprised woman.
  • Perfect numbers like perfect men are very rare.
  • Men are simple things. They can survive a whole weekend with only three things: beer, boxer shorts and batteries for the remote control.
  • To attract men, I wear a perfume called ‘New Car Interior’.
  • Men are alive for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
  • All men are not homeless, but some men are home less than others.
  • Men can read maps better than women. Cause only the male mind could conceive of one inch equalling a hundred miles
  • If you never want to see a man again, say, ‘I love you, I want to marry you. I want to have children with you …’ – they leave skid marks.
  • A man in the house is worth two in the street.
  • A genius is a man who can re-wrap a new shirt and not have any pins left over.
  • Young men think old men are fools; but old men know young men are fools.
  • Give a man a free hand and he’ll run it all over you.
  • I only like two kinds of men, domestic and foreign.
  • Men who don’t understand women fall into two groups: Bachelors and Husbands.
  • Man has will, but woman has her way.
  • If you want something said, ask a man; if you want something done, ask a woman.
  • When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.
  • Women don’t make fools of men most of them are the “do-it-yourself” types.
  • Men are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time … they’re gone.
  • You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.
  • A gentleman is simply a patient wolf.
  • Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near.
  • To a woman the first kiss is just the end of the beginning but to a man it is the beginning of the end.
  • To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
  • Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. And they are both disappointed.
  • There are easier things in life than trying to find a nice guy … like nailing jelly to a tree for example.
  • The more I see of men, the more I admire dogs …
  • Some Women would rather be beautiful than smart only because men can see way better than they can think.

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