What Is Safe To Eat?

For good health, we need to be careful what we eat and what we shouldn't. Choose wisely ...
Can't eat beef ... mad cow.

Can't eat chicken ... bird flu!

Can't eat eggs ... again, bird flu?

Can't eat pork ... fears that bird flu will infect piggies. 

Can't eat fish ... mercury in the waters has poisoned the meat

Can't eat fruits and veggies ... insecticides and herbicides

Hmmmm! I believe that leaves Chocolate!

If you are really hungry, how about a chocolate car?

Tag:healthyfooe

• Current Mood: amused

Food For Thought

Ten Funny Food Facts - To Give You Fodder For Thought ~

1) Apple is made of 25% air, that is why they float.

2) Avocado has the highest protein and oil content of all fruits.

3) Carrots were originally purple in colour, changing in the 17th Century to orange with newer varieties.

4) Celery requires more calories to eat and digest than it contains.

5) Cherries are a member of the rose family.

6) Corn always has an even number of ears. It only makes up about 8% of the weight in a box of corn flakes.

7) Honey is the only edible food for humans that will never go bad.

8) Lemons contain more sugar than strawberries.

9) Peanuts are one of the ingredients in dynamite.

10) Pear is a fruit that ripens from the inside out.

11) Eggplants (aubergine) are actually fruits, and classified botanically as berries.

12) Orange does not rhyme with any other word.

13) Peanuts are legumes [vegetables] and not a tree nut.

14) Peanuts are one of the ingredients in dynamite.

15) Pear is a fruit that ripens from the inside out.

16) Strawberries are the only fruit which has its seeds on its outer skin.

17) American's eat about 18 billion hot dogs a year.

18) Every time you lick a stamp you gain 1/10 of a calorie.

19) It takes around 10 litres of milk to make 1kg of cheese.

20) Did you know that during a lifetime the average person eats about 35 tons of food? Quite a thought!!

Tags:food,fodder

• Current Mood: busy

Breakfast Surprise!

There are those who wait all their lives for a pleasant surprise, and others who wish to give them but don't know when, what nor how. Here is a rather novel idea. For love, anniversary, birthday, let's-make-up, saying sorry or, why not, for no reason at all except a nice surprise, send a special 'surprise breakfast' to be delivered to someone's door?

'Matias Buenos Días' is a Catalan company that offers special surprise breakfast and breakfast baskets, which will be delivered to your door daily, or only at weekends, or on prearranged dates, to companies, business establishments and private homes, before 8 O'clock in the morning to your front door, together with your favourite newspapers. Freshly squeezed orange juice, steaming hot coffee, variety of fresh from the oven hot bread and rolls, croissants; jam, cheese, etc. This service is, for the moment, only available in the centre of Barcelona.

There's also the breakfast basket if you prefer, more of the so-called Continental style breakfast, which could be made up to your specification. This, yes, can be delivered to any area in Barcelona, including the surrounding suburbs. This basket with ample and good variety of food for 3 people costs €76. The Surprise Breakfast is €35, including a personal card with your own message and signature.

According to the proprietor, many people living in Barcelona have to make a little journey each morning to get their bread, as bakeries are usually located in secondary streets to avoid the higher city centre rent. In recent years, many big companies have adopted the American custom of 'work breakfast' or 'breakfast meetings' in the office for executives, their own staff, board meetings or for meetings with clients. They have 300 fixed clientele and deliver an average of 250 breakfasts daily.

The company is planning to expand his service to all areas in Barcelona, but has added that to have all breakfasts hot and arriving at everybody's door before 8 a.m. is quite a challenge.

Pity I live a whole 2 hours' away from the big city. Plus the fact that, with €35 I could have all my 3 meals of the day quite adequately and satisfactorily covered. Besides, 8 a.m. is far too early for me, almost cruel !

Tags:breakfastbasket,delivery

• Current Mood: awake

To All My Friends, Remember ...

* Remember to spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever. * Remember to say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side. * Remember to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent. * Remember to say, "I love you" to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. * Remember that a kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you. * Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment, for someday that person will not be there again. * Remember to give time to love, give time to speak, and give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind. To all my friends in my life, thanks for being there. From MoiMoii With Love

 

Tags: friendship, love

Prev: Life, Health, Potential, Ability

• Current Mood: awake

Life, Health, Potential, Ability

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, champagne in one hand - strawberries in the other, body thoroughly used up. Haven't I told you already recently?

Your looks doesn't count, show your potential and ability.

Tags: health,potential,ability

• Current Mood: amused

No Sex Since 1955

A crusty old Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young, idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.

"Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?"

"Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature."

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action."

"Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself."

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.

Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?"

"1955, ma'am."

"Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and quit taking everything so seriously! I mean, no sex since 1955!" She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to 'relax' him, several times.

Panting for breath afterwards she leaned against his bare chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955!"

The Sergeant Major, glancing at his watch, said in his matter-of-fact voice, "I hope not, it's only 2130 now."

Tags:sergeant,sex

• Current Mood: amused

He Says, She Says

He : "Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make Love to you really badly."

She: "Well, you've succeeded."

He "Shall we try swapping positions tonight?"

She "'That's a good idea ... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and eat popcorns."

He ''What have you been doing with all the grocery money that I gave you?"

She "Turn sideways and look in the mirror".

Q: Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good looking?

A: Because those men already have boyfriends.

Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?

A: A rumour.

Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?

A: 45 minutes.

Q: What's the fastest way to a man's heart?

A: Through his chest with a sharp knife.

Q: Why do men want to marry virgins?

A: They can't stand criticism.

Q: What makes men chase women if they have no intention of marrying?

A: The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

Q: What do you do if you see a man running around with half a head?

A: Reload and try again!

Tags:hesays,shesays

• Current Mood: amused

Train Facts With Humour

While New York converted to unmanned trains in 1962, the London Underground has maintained its drivers. Some say that passenger's would not trust the driver-less trains, others say it is pressure from the unions. Yet other cynics say that the trains are actually automatic, and the drivers are just there to re-assure the passengers. This theory is borne out by some of these tannoy messages allegedly spoken by London underground drivers.

1) What do the Drivers Know?

* This train will NOT be stopping at Moorgate station. I repeat, this train will NOT stop at Moorgate"…………, "Ladies and gentlemen...this train IS stopping at Moorgate, and of course I'm the last to know"

2) No Begging

* "Please note that begging is not permitted in any part of London Underground. However, to the gentleman busking away happily next to the escalators, please carry on and enjoy yourself. The transport police have been called and should be with you shortly..."

* "Beggars are operating on this train, please do NOT encourage these professional beggars, if you have any spare change, please give it to a registered charity, failing that, give it to me!"

3) Zany London Tube Drivers add Spice to the Journey

* "We are taking the scenic route to Barking on the District Line. We will be stopping at all stations to Barking with the exception of Cannon Street. This train does not stop there on Saturdays due to ....(PAUSE) ...total lack of interest."

* "This is Paddington Station. Please leave your valuables on the train and I will collect them at the end of my shift."

* "Hello this is the captain of your Uxbridge train speaking, and we will be departing shortly. Please note that we will be cruising at an altitude of approximately zero feet, and our scheduled arrival time in Uxbridge is 11:15pm. The temperature in Uxbridge is a cool 10 degrees Celsius, and Uxbridge is in the same time zone as Aldgate, so there's no need to adjust your watches."

* "May I remind all passengers that there is strictly no smoking allowed on any part of the Underground. However, if you are smoking a joint it is only fair that you pass it round the rest of the carriage".

4) Drivers out of Control?

* "To the gentleman wearing the pin-striped suit trying to get in to the third carriage, what part of 'stand clear of the doors' don't you understand?"

* "Covent Garden has been closed due overcrowding. Please alight at Leicester Square and wander around aimlessly with your huge rucksacks until you get to your destination. You never know, they might install escalators one day!"

* "Would the lady going down the escalator please lower her umbrella, it doesn't rain underground."

* "Please let the passengers off the train"……… "Please let the passengers off the train first"………. "PLEASE let the passengers off the train first"…….. "let the passengers off the train FIRST!"…... "Go on then, stuff yourselves in like sardines, see if I care, I'm going home."

Footnote:

The world's first ungrounded train opened on January 10th 1863. It was a Metropolitan line stretch between Paddington and Farrington.


Tags:trains,announcements

• Current Mood: amused

Slogan Competition

Four insurance companies are in competition. One comes up with the slogan "Coverage from the cradle to the grave."

The Second one tries to improve on that with "Coverage from the womb to the tomb."

Not to be outdone, the third one comes up with "From the sperm to the worm."

The fourth insurance company really thought hard and almost gave up the race, but finally came up with "From the erection to the resurrection."

Tag:resurrection

• Current Mood: amused

The Dentist, The Old Lady, & The Rubber Gloves

Next time you use a pair of rubber gloves, you're going to smile when you think of this:

A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves, to calm her nurves.

'Do you know how they make these gloves?' he asked.

'No, I don't,' she replied.

'Well,' he spoofed, 'there's a building in Canada with a big tank of latex and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let them dry, then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right size.'

She didn't crack a smile. 'Oh, well. I tried,' he thought.

But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she burst out laughing.

'What's so funny?' he asked

'I was just envisioning how condoms are made!'

Gotta watch those little old ladies! Their minds are always Working!

Tag:rubbergloves

For All Who Were Born Between The 30's & The 70's

TO ALL WHO WERE BORN IN THE 1930's 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's !!

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they carried us.
They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes.

Then after that trauma, our baby cribs were covered with bright coloured lead-based paints.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.

As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.

Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat.

We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.

We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank soda pop with sugar in it, but we weren't overweight because...
WE WERE ALWAYS OUTDOOR PLAYING!!

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.

No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, no video tape movies, no surround sound, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms. WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.

We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.

We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.

We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them!

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't have to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!

This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!

The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.

We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned
HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!

And YOU are one of them!

CONGRATULATIONS! Tags: Foodforthought

Is Virginity A Matter Of The State Now?

Apparently yes, according to the court decision yesterday, in Lille, northern France. It had also been deemed as "an essential quality" of a woman. The Court accepted the petition of the husband who, on the wedding night, found his new wife not a virgin and he sent her home to her parents that very same night, and immediately started legal petition to have the marriage annulled. This happened in April and yesterday the Tribunal Court granted his petition. The marriage is now legally non existent.

However, the matter evoked huge outcry in all sectors, inciting social debates and furious political storm, obligating the Minister of Justice, originally reluctant, to command the public prosecutor the presentation of an appeal and a reversion. The Prime Minister condemned it as "going back to the middle ages" and added that "if necessary, would take the matter to the High Court of Repeal and jurisprudence."

The groom's reasons: The rejection of the bride was not entirely because she was not a virgin, but her lie leading him to believe she was.

The lawyer representing the husband: His client felt he could not build a solid union with a liar right from the start of their life together, and in whom he felt he could never trust.

The rejected wife: "I am relieved that the marriage is over. Can't stay with a man who thinks virginity is more important than the woman herself."

The court in Lille: "The marriage was contracted under the influence of an objective error, which had been the determining factor of the agreement of marriage. And, the woman had admitted that she lied."

The public: Outrageous to consider virginity as an essential quality of a woman, violation of liberty and human rights, incrimination against women when no one ever questions a man's virginity ...

Me: I am somewhat confused. Like watching a film scene of a court of justice, featuring a prolonged proceeding and listening to the prosecutor and defence lawyer, both brilliant, each giving very convincing arguments. Confused and complicated further by witnesses' sometimes contradicting accounts, I often find that I agree with EVERYBODY! Or, put in another way, I disagree with ALL of them.

My views: Well, the husband was right in that he felt he couldn't construct a permanent union with a woman who lied. But I doubt also whether her not being a virgin was not the primary motive. Although he lives in modern times with French nationality and an engineer, he is a Muslim.

The woman should never have lied but ... If she couldn't tell the absolute truth about herself with someone she was to spend the rest of her life with, how often she would need to lie in a whole life time? But then, if virginity was in their religion, or personal and deep-rooted conviction as the foremost virtue, she was likely so frightened that her loved one wouldn't accept her. Which had now been proven true.

As to the public, in the personal matter between husband and wife, it's nobody else's business why they got together or why they part. The Law? Definitely needs mending, but not because this particular couple should be united together again as a married couple, but virginity or lack of it should never be legal ground for an annulment.

Tags:virginity,marriage,law

• Current Mood: blah

life's Ironies

• Life is sexually transmitted.
• Good health is merely the slowest rate at which one can die
• Men have two emotions: Horny and Hungry. If he'S not chasing you, make him a sandwich.
• Give a person a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and he won't bother you for weeks.
• Some people are like a slinky - not really good for much, but you can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
• Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital dying of nothing.
• All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
• Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars, and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
• In the 60s, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
• They know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America, but they haven't a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located.
  
  Tag:irony

• Current Mood: amused

For Ladies With Good Humour

** How to tell the sex of birds:

I never fully understood how to tell the difference between male and female birds. I always thought it had to be determined by an expert vet or surgically - Until now ...

See if you can spot which of the two is the female. It can be done, even by one with limited bird watching skills.

** Highway Security:

The National Highway Safety Council has done extensive testing on a newly designed seat belt. Results show that accidents can be reduced by as much as 45% when the belt is properly installed.
 
The Correct installation is illustrated below:

Tags:BirdSex,HighwaySecurity

• Current Mood: amused

Imagination & Interpretation

** Several weeks after a young man had been hired, he was called into the personnel director's office.

"What is the meaning of this?" the director asked. "When you applied for the job, you told us you had five years' experience. Now we discovered this is the first job you've ever held."

"Well," the young man replied, "In your advertisement you said you wanted somebody with imagination."

** A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.

The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."

The husband said, "You are in charge of food & drink around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."

Wife replies, "No. You should do it and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee"

Husband replies, "I can't believe that. Show me."

So she fetched the Bible, opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages that it indeed says "Hebrews".

** A plane was taking off from Kennedy airport. After it reached a comfortable altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom,

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and therefore, we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax ... OH MY GOD!"

Silence followed and after a few minutes the captain came back on the intercom and said:

"Ladies and Gentlemen. I am so sorry if I scared you earlier, but while I was talking, the flight attendant brought me a cup of coffee and spilled the lot in my lap, You should see the front of my pants."

A passenger in the cabin yelled, "That's nothing. You should see the bottom of mine."

Tags;Imagination,flight

• Current Mood: amused

Intriguing Garden Shop Sign

I wonder if they come in different colours? I wonder about the fragrance? I wonder if it would help to put those preservative packets in the water? I wonder if they bloom? I wonder whether they would look better on the kitchen table or in the entry? I wonder if they're cheaper by the dozen? I wonder if they come long-stemmed? ** I am talking of course about what's advertised below ... ** Captured at 115th and Allisonville Road. In Fishers ( Indianapolis ). The sign was real and was for two hours before someone stopped and told them how to spell peonies!

SUBMIT CENTER Upload Picture Write Blog Create Poll Create Quiz Upload Music Upload Videos Submit News Post Question

Tags:peonies,penis

• Current Mood: amused

A Bad Apple

Most of us must have at sometime or another experienced great and unrestrained passion, which is nonsensical, insensate, inexplicable, even perverse, forbidden and often involuntary. Who has never lost his head or been obsessed with an imbecile, idiotic, totally illogical desire or fantasy? You can be so besotted over someone or something, that you know full well to be unworthy or even dangerous but, you simply can't help it. The kind of passion that embraces both love and hate. Rejection and acceptance.

Mine, recently, was about a book, or it could be said about an author and therefore her work. I am talking about Fred Fragas, a pen name. The book is in Spanish, called 'La Tercera Virgen' (The 3rd Virgin). I read it a couple of months ago, my first encounter with this author. Only pages into the book I had my first doubt that I was going to finish it, as I found some of the pages irritating. I didn't immediately discard it, with the idea that 'I would definitely do so, just after I found out where all that annoying descriptive narration is going.' That's all I wanted to do, I thought; at least that's what I told myself each time I got annoyed or tired with her nonsense but, I kept on anyway and just couldn't put it down, and was almost surprised to find myself up to the page that marked clearly half the book already.

That went on, albeit with certain reluctance, even though every few pages later I would say to myself that it was ridiculous to go on any further but, somehow, I kept turning the pages anyway, " just one or two pages more." Almost equally irritated with myself for not able to resist her fastidious way of story telling, her crazy ideas and styles, her use of words and phrases through mouths of her characters, sometimes rather incoherent and infantile, other times provoking and plain challenging to my tolerance. Despite all that, I was hopelessly trapped and conquered by then to 'stick it out', instead of the normal, natural and logical desire to peep at the last page, to know the ending of a captivating story.

I finished the book and knew that I would seek out the others with her name shown as the author. I guess she herself must be in many ways featured and reflected in the combination of the various characters. There's always a bit of the author in what he or she writes. Like I do in my BLogs and you in yours. I perceive her to be of strong character, frank, honest, too down to earth to be accepted by convention, daring, even outrageous at times, sarcastic but contained, wild but exercising self control but, at the same time, humble, tender and loving. I am in many ways like that. Maybe that's why I couldn't chuck the book out. It's as though she was writing about me!!! Contrary. Not in any particular character, but a composite of all those characters, leaving out a few small aspects here and there.

I have long realized that a commercially or academically successful and well acclaimed books are not synonym of a masterpieces, nor are they necessarily books of literary value. Neither is a sell-out film the best movie; nor art in it's many forms that fetched the highest price the most artistic. A good person may well have his weak and shady side while a bad apple are sometimes extra sweet; that's often why the apple is bad in the first place, because it attracted worms.


Tags:attraction,obsession,book,apple

• Current Mood: artistic

Second Class Victim

As much as my firm belief in the equality of the sexes, I can't agree with the Spanish court's recent decision, that the fairer sex should receive a lighter sentence than her counterpart, presuming that they had both committed the same crime. This came about when a woman was charged of violence against her husband. If the blow from her dainty little hand hurt less, she certainly had the same intention to hurt with all her might when she struck out.

According to the Ministry of Justice, only 10% of domestic violence are committed by women (5% only according to the State Observatory of Violence against women). The reason of the court decision is not clear, at least not to me, but it seems to have established that women violators would be given the consideration of being, simply, women. Is this in fact the 'machista' way of saying women are the weaker species?

I don't share the elation of those who applauded such a constitutional resolution because, I think, instead of being effective it would only serve to flare up the polarization between the sexes. A victim is a victim, be it referring to a man or a woman. One as well as the other has the same right of wearing trousers.

What happens if, let's say, for the abandonment of a new born baby, on what could the court base for giving out a lesser penalty to a woman but a heavier one if the evil doer is a man? Doesn't the baby suffer the same degree of harm? Is there such a thing as a lesser death?

Tags:equality,violence,penalty

• Current Mood: blah

Things That Will Destroy Us

** Politics without principle.

** Pleasure without conscience.

** Wealth without work.

** Knowledge without character.

** Business without morality.

** Science without humanity.

** And worship without sacrifice.

 

Mahatma Gandhi

Tag:MahatmaGandhi

• Current Mood: awake