- Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives.
- Polynesia -- memory loss in parrots.
- A good pun is its own reward.
- Laughing stock - cattle with a sense of humour?
- Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!
- For sale: parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
- A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
- I said "no" to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen.
- Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
- If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?
- Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
- Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
- Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!
- Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
- I wouldn't be caught dead with a necrophiliac.
- The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
- All generalizations are false, including this one.
- I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
- I want patience... AND I WANT IT NOW!!!!
- The sooner you fall behind, the more time you have to catch up.
- I have friends who swear they dream in colour ... It's just a pigment of their imagination.
- There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't.
Tags: contradictory2, sarcastic
Prev: 11th Sept 2011 Sarcastic & Contradictory Humour
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